girl next door

sydney

stressed, depressed & ratchet as fuck

anatometh:

anatometh:

Teenage life, a combination of texts messages I have received

i love it so much

dont-harshmyvibe:

if you tickle me it’s either going to lead to kissing or an extreme act of violence

(via beautifullyysinister)

9:10 AM + 257544 + reblog
" Please don’t fall in love
With anyone else
Please please please
Don’t hold their hand and trace circles on their thumb with yours
Oh god, please don’t
Kiss their lips and tell them they’re gorgeous
Please don’t please
Kiss every inch of their body and tell them that god made them perfect
Don’t oh god don’t
Grab them by their waist and whisper in their ear that they’re all yours forever
And please don’t oh god don’t
Tell them that you love them, always and promise them a future with wedding bells and a white dress and kids and a big house and your morning breath and kisses and smiles whenever they say something funny, worst yet your laugh or your touch at 2am when they can’t sleep
Oh god please
Don’t make them fall in love with you just like I did "
2688 / reblog
sintire:

 click here to enter into a teenage boys mind
" Just say what you mean and mean what you say. Don’t expect someone to read your mind and don’t play games with heads or hearts. Don’t tell half truths and expect trust when the full truth comes out; half truths are no better then lies. Don’t be cold to someone you care about; indifference hurts more than angry words. "
1425 / reblog
" Sometimes I just wanna fuck, and sometimes I wanna be in love, and sometimes I wanna be alone. "
395991 / reblog
"

It has never been easy. When I was sixteen, I knew every potentially fatal thing in my house: Nail polish remover under the sink. Bottle of rubbing alcohol beside it. Hammer in the tool box. Forty foot bridge across the highway. Traffic outside my window.

I thought about slamming my own head against a counter until I lost feeling. I thought about punching myself in the face until I stopped breathing. I thought about running out into the street at two a.m. and waiting until a car came.

I never thought I’d make it to twenty-five. But I told myself to stay. Just for a little longer. Just to see.

So I did. I sat silent amongst my friends, searching for a way to speak. I stopped leaving my house. I swapped sleeping for staying up all night, staring at my bedroom walls. When someone came into my room to talk to me, I started crying. But I stayed. Because I thought, if I plan on dying in a few years anyway, what do I have to lose? And some days I didn’t feel like I was being swallowed whole. Some days I sat by my pool and sang until the sun set. Some days I kissed somebody on their parent’s couch and didn’t feel lonely when I got to my own bed. Some days I listened to a really great song and felt understood, if only for a second.

I stayed. And still I thought about bridges. And hammers to the head. And swallowing acetone to cleanse my insides. But slowly slowly slowly I began to understand that it was okay to cry, and shake, and feel anything but okay. I realized that there would still be days that my fist would rise to my cheek. And still, my face would sometimes resemble a bruised peach.

But now I tear up my lists of potentially ways to die before I complete them. I replace prescription: pills, rubbing alcohol, and razors with memories of the good days. Of holding your hand through the entire state of Oregon. Of running half-naked down a snowy street three New Year’s ago. Of riding go-carts in the Canadian wilderness. Of smoking cigarettes on the beach in San Francisco with someone I met six months ago. If I had left, we never would have met.

If you feel the same way, stay. For the good days. And the sunsets. And the people out there who understand. Stay because being submerged in black water does not mean you have to drown. Stay. Just for a little longer. Just to see.

"
6895 / reblog
" I hope you know that I’m not just here for the way your bones feel against mine or the way you kiss me like this is the end of the world. I’m here to wake you when you start crying in your sleep and I’m here to clean up the blood when your breathing gets shallow. I’m here to hold you back when you try to jump and I’m here to hold your hand when I can’t stop you. and I love the way you say my name and the way you look when it’s cold out. I’m here for every bit of you. Even the messy bits. and that’s how it will always be. We fell in love two years ago when we were tired and it was raining hard on both of us but I would stand out in a storm forever if it meant I got to fall asleep next to you. "
6128 / reblog